If an Adam Sandler movie drops on Netflix, and his face never appears, is it still an Adam Sandler movie? You may find yourself pondering that (along with many other things) as you watch The Wrong Missy, the latest uninspired Happy Madison production to stream for the masses. Indeed, everything in Sandler’s world is involved in this—including his wife, two kids, nephew, frequent co-stars David Spade and Rob Schneider, Chris Farley’s brother, and even the exotic locale that fits in perfectly with the Happy Madison mission statement of only making movies where Sandler and his team feel like vacationing for a month.

Spade leads the way as Tim Morris, a boring white-collar guy who has broken up with his fiancée (Sarah Chalke) and is meeting blind date Missy (Lauren Lapkus). A wild-child who with no filter and absolutely zero inhibitions, she also has no “off” switch. After nearly getting Tim killed via a prank before they even meet, she remains completely clueless after barging into the men’s room and finding him scurrying out the window to escape.

After three months, Tim bumps into a different Missy (Molly Sims) in the airport and clicks instantly—same taste in books, luggage, and beverages—but they part ways without getting the chance to go any further. Later, however, when he’s packing gearing up for an upcoming corporate retreat in Hawaii, he texts Missy to invite her to come along, but mistakenly texts… (insert title here).

In the tradition of the icky Shallow Hal and Amy Schumer’s not-much-better I Feel PrettyThe Wrong Missy is predicated on one of moviedom’s most tired ideas: the model-good-looks woman is the catch, and the off-kilter weirdo is the spawn of Satan, but that, yes, in the end, it’s the weirdo who actually has the heart of gold. So it’s no secret that’s exactly what we get here, with the hope that Missy’s nutso hijinks are enough to keep the movie puttering along. When those hijinks include twerking, giving a mile-high happy ending, and puking into a shark tank, however, how much potential does a movie really have?

More than that, though, the crux of the movie—that Tim becomes a better man because he learns tolerance and understanding—is undermined by the fact that, about halfway through the movie, Missy just…chills, for no reason whatsoever. Sure, give Lupkus all the credit in the world for throwing her all into the part (as long as she needs to, anyway), but take it away from screenwriters Chris Pappas and Kevin Barnett for forgetting what got us all here in the first place.

As with most Happy Madison flicks, how The Wrong Missy goes down will depend first and foremost on your mood heading into it. If you’re sick and tired of quarantine, and the kids were particularly destructive and rambunctious today, it’s quite possible you won’t even make it through the entire movie and will instead find something more productive to do with your time, like cleaning a toilet or sorting your books by color. If, though, you had a perfectly nice, relaxing day, and the sun is shining down on you and yours, well—you may just nod and shrug and go on your merry way, content that you only lost 90 minutes of your life.

Rating

1.5/5 stars