Turns out all the pedigree in the world (the Marvel brand, writer/director Chloe Zhao, and a top-flight cast) is no match for a silly script that makes you seriously wonder how anyone associated with this kept a straight face. More foolish than it is fun and more dazzle than it is drama, ‘Eternals’ is pretty to look at, sure, but is sorely lacking the smarts and grounded-in-reality heft that has long been a mainstay in the Marvel camp.

2/5 stars